Oh wow.

I have a feeling that this is going to be a long one.

I'm kinda all torn up with my feelings right now, anger, frustration, confusion, sadness - all because once again it's messed up.

Nothing ever goes the way you want it to, and when you think you're finally winning - you're not. It's all a trick. People are so deceiving, it's actually ridiculous to think that you should trust anyone but yourself.

You have the potential to be such a great person, why are you such a dick?

Don't ever love anyone. If there's one thing you should take from me, take that. Love hurts so much. You can take as much advice from people as you want, but when it all comes down to it - the only person you can listen to is yourself. You need to make your own mistakes in order to learn right from wrong and what's good for you.

I wish I'd make that decision all those years ago, the decision not to add it. Not to do it. But I did and look at the mess I'm in now.